Laurent Grenier's newsletter
Inspirational and Philosophical Tote Bag
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Greetings! I am Laurent Grenier*, author of the book A REASON FOR LIVING. Welcome to my newsletter!
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Last issue:
LITTLE TREASURES
The Internet is a gold mine, though it is also a dumping ground. Here are for your benefit some treasures that I have chanced upon and collected along the way.
"Why not let people differ about their answers to the great mysteries of the Universe? Let each seek one's own way to the highest, to one's own sense of supreme loyalty in life, one's ideal of life. Let each philosophy, each world-view bring forth its truth and beauty to a larger perspective, that people may grow in vision, stature and dedication.
"The religions of humanity should be a unifying force, for all the great religions reveal a basic unity in ethics. Whether it be Judaism, Catholicism, Protestantism, Buddhism or Confucianism, all grow out of a sense of the sacredness of human life. This moral sensitivity to the sacredness of human personality – the Commandments not to kill, not to hurt, not to put a stumbling block in the path of the blind, not to neglect the widow or the fatherless, not to exploit the servant or the worker – all this can be found in the Bibles of humanity, in all the sacred books. All teach in substance: Do unto others as you would that others should do unto you. There is, then, a basic unity among the great religions in the matter of ethics. True, there are religious philosophies which turn people away from the world, from the here and now, concentrating life-purposes on salvation for one's self or a mystic union with some supernatural reality. But most of the great religions agree on mercy, justice, love – here on earth. And they agree that the great task is to move people from apathy, from an acceptance of the evils in life, to face the possibilities of the world, to make life sweet for one another instead of bitter. This is the unifying ethical task of all the religions – yes, of all the philosophies of humankind. There is no need to force our own theological points of view upon one another or to insist that the moral life grows out of final, absolute authority." ~ Algernon Black.
"Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful." ~ Albert Schweitzer.
"I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I do know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who have sought and found how to serve." ~ Albert Schweitzer.
"Happiness comes when your work and words are of benefit to yourself and others." ~ Buddha.
"There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness." ~ Carl Jung.
"Consider the following. We humans are social beings. We come into the world as the result of others' actions. We survive here in dependence on others. Whether we like it or not, there is hardly a moment of our lives when we do not benefit from others' activities. For this reason it is hardly surprising that most of our happiness arises in the context of our relationships with others.
"Nor is it so remarkable that our greatest joy should come when we are motivated by concern for others. But that is not all. We find that not only do altruistic actions bring about happiness but they also lessen our experience of suffering. Here I am not suggesting that the individual whose actions are motivated by the wish to bring others' happiness necessarily meets with less misfortune than the one who does not. Sickness, old age, mishaps of one sort or another are the same for us all. But the sufferings which undermine our internal peace – anxiety, doubt, disappointment – these things are definitely less. In our concern for others, we worry less about ourselves. When we worry less about ourselves an experience of our own suffering is less intense.
"What does this tell us? Firstly, because our every action has a universal dimension, a potential impact on others' happiness, ethics are necessary as a means to ensure that we do not harm others. Secondly, it tells us that genuine happiness consists in those spiritual qualities of love, compassion, patience, tolerance and forgiveness and so on. For it is these which provide both for our happiness and others' happiness." ~ HH the Dalai Lama (Ethics for a New Millennium).
"Many people have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." ~ Helen Keller.
"That man is richest whose pleasures are cheapest." ~ Henry David Thoreau.
"All seasons are beautiful for the person who carries happiness within." ~ Horace Friess.
"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet." ~ James Oppenheim.
"Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open." ~ John Barrymore.
"The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make heaven of Hell, and a hell of Heaven." ~ John Milton.
"Listen to the Exhortation of the Dawn!
Look to this Day!
For it is Life, the very Life of Life.
In its brief course lie
All the verities and Realities of your Existence.
The Bliss of Growth,
The Glory of Action,
The Splendor of Beauty;
For Yesterday is but a Dream,
And To-morrow is only a Vision;
But To-day well lived
Makes every Yesterday a Dream of Happiness,
And every Tomorrow a Vision of Hope.
Look well therefore to this Day!
Such is the Salutation of the Dawn!"
~ Kalidasa.
"Happiness is not so much in having as sharing. We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give." ~ Norman MacEwan.
"There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life – happiness, freedom, and peace of mind – are always attained by giving them to someone else." ~ Peyton Conway March.
"Love is a condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own." ~ Robert Heinlein.
"If I have been of service, if I have glimpsed more of the nature and essence of ultimate good, if I am inspired to reach wider horizons of thought and action, if I am at peace with myself, it has been a successful day." ~ Alex Noble.
"Too bad that all the people who really know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair." ~
George Burns.
"I do not want the peace that passeth understanding. I want the understanding which bringeth peace." ~ Helen Keller.
"Science is organized knowledge. Wisdom is organized life." ~ Immanuel Kant.
"Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win." ~ Jonathan Kozol (On Being a Teacher).
"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." ~ Mark Twain (?).
"The beginning of wisdom is found in doubting; by doubting we come to the question, and by seeking we may come upon the truth." ~ Pierre Abelard.
"But goodness alone is never enough. A hard cold wisdom is required, too, for goodness to accomplish good. Goodness without wisdom invariably accomplishes evil." ~ Robert Heinlein.
"It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and say the opposite." ~ Sam Levenson.
"An idealist believes the short run doesn't count. A cynic believes the long run doesn't matter. A realist believes that what is done or left undone in the short run determines the long run." ~ Sydney J. Harris.
"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." ~ Albert Einstein.
"Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living." ~ Anais Nin.
"One act of beneficence, one act of real usefulness, is worth all the abstract sentiment in the world." ~ Ann Radcliffe.
"Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts." ~ Aristotle.
"It's important to know that words don't move mountains. Work, exacting work moves mountains." ~ Danilo Dolci.
"Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little." ~ Edmund Burke.
"All that is necessary for evil to succeed is that good men do nothing." ~ Edmund Burke.
"I am only one,
But still I am one.
I cannot do everything,
But still I can do something;
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do the something that I can do."
~ Edward Everett Hale.
"We have committed the Golden Rule to memory; let us now commit it to life." ~ Edwin Markham.
"One ship sails East,
And another West,
By the self-same winds that blow,
Tis the set of the sails
And not the gales,
That tells the way we go.
"Like the winds of the sea
Are the waves of time,
As we journey along through life,
Tis the set of the soul,
That determines the goal,
And not the calm or the strife."
~ Ella Wheeler Wilcox.
"Those who profess to favor freedom and yet depreciate agitation, are people who want crops without ploughing the ground; they want rain without thunder and lightning; they want the ocean without the roar of its many waters. The struggle may be a moral one, or it may be a physical one, or it may be both. But it must be a struggle. Power concedes nothing without a demand; it never has and it never will." ~ Frederick Douglass.
"The most solid comfort one can fall back upon is the thought that the business of one's life is to help in some small way to reduce the sum of ignorance, degradation and misery on the face of this beautiful earth." ~ George Eliot.
"Nature knows no pause in progress and development, and attaches her curse on all inaction." ~ Goethe.
"I long to accomplish a great and noble tasks, but it is my chief duty to accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble. The world is moved along, not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker." ~ Helen Keller.
"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." ~ Helen Keller.
"The heights by great men reached and kept
Were not attained by sudden flight,
But they, while their companions slept,
Were toiling upward in the night."
~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.
"To live for results would be to sentence myself to continuous frustration. My only sure reward is in my actions and not from them." ~ Hugh Prather.
"Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can." ~ John Wesley.
"A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle." ~ Kahlil Gibran.
"By the choices and acts of our lives, we create the person that we are and the faces that we wear. By the choices and acts of our lives we give to the world wherein our lives are lived, hoping that our neighbors will find our contributions to be of worth, and hoping that the world will be a little more gracious for our time in it." ~ Kenneth Patton.
"There are two kinds of failures: those who thought and never did, and those who did and never thought." ~ Laurence J. Peter.
"Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself." ~ Leo Tolstoy.
"Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials." ~ Lin Yutang.
"Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." ~ Margaret Mead.
"We must not, in trying to think about how we can make a big difference, ignore the small daily differences we can make which, over time, add up to big differences that we often cannot foresee." ~ Marian Wright Edelman.
"It is not only for what we do that we are held responsible, but also for what we do not do." ~ Molière.
"You cannot make yourself feel something you do not feel, but you can make yourself do right in spite of your feelings." ~ Pearl S. Buck.
"I'm a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it." ~ Thomas Jefferson.
"To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right." ~ Confucius.
"To fly, we need to have resistance." Maya Lin.
"Peace is not the absence of war; it is a virtue, a state of mind, a disposition for benevolence, confidence, and justice." ~ Spinoza.
"Opportunity is missed by most because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." ~ Thomas Alva Edison.
"We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms -- to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." ~ Viktor Frankl.
"The greatest discovery of our generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind. As you think, so shall you be." ~ William James.
"There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~ Anais Nin.
"It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows." ~ Epictetus.
"Creativity requires the courage to let go of certainties." Erich Fromm.
"Moral cowardice that keeps us from speaking our minds is as dangerous to this country as irresponsible talk. The right way is not always the popular and easy way. Standing for right when it is unpopular is a true test of moral character." ~ Margaret Chase Smith.
"When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers." Ralph Waldo Emerson.
"To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily. To not dare is to lose oneself." ~ Soren Kierkegaard.
"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invincible summer." ~ Albert Camus.
"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved." ~ Helen Keller.
"Mishaps are like knives, that either serve us or cut us, as we grasp them by the blade or the handle." ~ James Russell Lowell.
"If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment." ~ Marcus Aurelius.
"... when we finally know we are dying, and all other sentient beings are dying with us, we start to have a burning, almost heartbreaking sense of the fragility and preciousness of each moment and each being, and from this can grow a deep, clear, limitless compassion for all beings." ~ Sogyal Rinpoche.
"What man actually needs is not a tensionless state but rather the striving and struggling for some goal worthy of him. What he needs is not the discharge of tension at any cost, but the call of a potential meaning waiting to be fulfilled by him." ~ Victor Frankl.
"How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four; calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg." ~ Abraham Lincoln.
"What a man believes upon grossly insufficient evidence is an index into his desires – desires of which he himself is often unconscious. If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence. The origin of myths is explained in this way." ~ Bertrand Russell.
"Fear grows in darkness; if you think there's a bogeyman around, turn on the light." ~ Dorothy Thompson.
"New opinions often appear first as jokes and fancies, then as blasphemies and treason, then as questions open to discussion, and finally as established truths." ~ George Bernard Shaw.
"Anyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority is not using his intelligence; he is just using his memory." ~ Leonardo da Vinci.
"The day will come when the mystical generation of Jesus by the Supreme Being in the womb of a virgin, will be classed with the fable of the generation of Minerva in the brain of Jupiter." ~ Thomas Jefferson.
"Believe nothing just because a so-called wise person said it. Believe nothing just because a belief is generally held. Believe nothing just because it is said in ancient books. Believe nothing just because it is said to be of divine origin. Believe nothing just because someone else believes it. Believe only what you yourself test and judge to be true." ~ Buddha.
~ ~ ~
That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy!
20 June 2005
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WISDOM
What is wisdom? But first, what are the conditions that render it desirable, if not necessary, and what is its essential purpose?
Life is a desire to live, and better still a desire to live happily. As we strive to satisfy this desire, we encounter obstacles that complicate or frustrate our efforts. This complication or frustration amounts to suffering because it stands in the way of satisfaction.
Wisdom is designed to help us cope with this suffering. It is an adaptive product of reason in the face of tough circumstances. Thanks to it, happiness is conceivable and achievable in spite of everything. It is therefore the supreme good.
Actually, religion is a good that many rank equally high, since it serves the same purpose as wisdom, if differently. The difference lies in the way religion and wisdom portray suffering and define the meaning of life.
From the perspective of religion, suffering betrays a state of worldly imperfection that is in contradiction with the human desire for perfect happiness. Consequently, life here below – where humans are doomed to suffer – is absurd in itself. Or rather, life is meaningful strictly in terms of means to a heavenly end in the great beyond: A life of virtue prepares the way for an afterlife of bliss. The religious believe this in accordance with the teachings of an inspired spiritual leader, who claims to know the transcendental nature of the hereafter.
While personally I cast a skeptical eye on these teachings, I keep my mind open. They are highly suspicious, but the transcendental nature of their object puts them beyond the reach of any discredit based on conclusive evidence.
Anyway, as I see it, wisdom is independent of religion, though it can complement the latter. According to it, life in itself has meaning, despite its imperfection that people can learn to accept. Better still, they can learn to value this imperfection as they realize that perfection, contrary to popular belief, is not infinitely desirable.
Indeed, perfect happiness leaves something to be desired. By definition, it excludes suffering and hence all forms of complication or frustration. It supposes that circumstances are absolutely favorable – that is, not tough in any way. Therefore, no effort is necessary while every dream is possible. At first glance, this sounds like the most wonderful situation imaginable, and yet taking another look at it will dispel this illusion.
What strange whim, in the history of humankind, has compelled people from every walk of life to leave their cozy home and embark on risky ventures? Perhaps this whim is not so strange after all. A multitude of conquests have been made for the sheer joy of conquering against great odds. The operative word is pride, accompanied by excitement. To conquest-minded people the infinite ease of heaven entails infinite boredom. To them life – together with the struggle that is integral to it – is the very thing that perfect happiness leaves to be desired. It is an opportunity to prove courageous and victorious, though it is also a risk of failing painfully.
Happiness is about grasping this opportunity with courage and gaining a victory over the obstacles that stand between us and success in all the activities that most matter to us. This victory is often strenuous and always limited, precarious, and transitory, and we are bound to lose the battle in the end; but that makes the victory all the more precious and worthy of savoring.
When trying to define the activities in which we most care to succeed, we are forced to study our nature to know our purpose. Our growing wise depends on this study and this knowledge, leading to this definition. It begins with an awareness of our animal will to survive, as survival is the foundation on which life, in the truly human sense, is built. The awareness of life in this sense follows. It takes into account both our humanity and our individuality, as members of society with particular tastes and abilities to which a wide range of activities are suited.
The clearer we are about our purpose, the more we can live our lives with determination and passion, and so with a greater chance of succeeding and achieving happiness. The reverse is equally true. It therefore stands to reason that in striving after wisdom we lay the groundwork for success and happiness.
~ ~ ~
SUFFERING
Since wisdom is the art of coping with suffering, it starts with a willingness to tackle it head-on:
a) Such is the harshness of our condition that we suffer, sometimes greatly or worse, insuperably.
b) Such is the richness of our nature that we can learn to live happily, or at least serenely, within the limits of this condition. This entails us either pursuing goals that are not only desirable and honorable but also attainable or resigning ourselves to the inevitable.
Admittedly, a great many suffer whose suffering is all the more problematic as their wisdom is still largely in the making. I remember my own past as a young unhappy and suicidal man who composed dark poems. My negative attitude compounded my difficult situation, and I was ignorant of my ability to improve both. Today, I feel deeply connected with those who live in the limbo of gloom. Even if my words only reach one of them, they will not have been written in vain.
I have recently come across some dark poetry, reminiscent of mine in my young days. The author – Melyssa G. Sprott – is a young talented woman whose life has been poisoned by abuse and other hardships. Her suffering and her talent have inspired me to feature some of her work and respond to it. Note that my responding to it in a positive manner testifies to my being help-minded, but note also that my responses are written in a spirit of humbleness. I don't claim to provide a remedy; I just try my best to give some useful insights.
* * *
The following excerpts are from one of Melyssa's collection of poems, entitled "Descent into the Dark." They reveal her aching soul with the moving simplicity of a woman crying for her overwhelming grief.
1.
When I was six,
my father had me convinced
I wasn't worth the air I breathed,
the food I'd cost,
or other things I'd need.
When I was six,
my father didn't want children
or want the wife he kept,
so we were forced to suffer
for my father's regrets.
"Remember to tell him you love him or you'll die,"
Mother sings her twisted lullaby.
"Wish for mercy, pray for death,
await the day he ceases breath.
He'll wake you up at three in the morning
to beat you senseless without warning.
It doesn't matter how still you lie,"
Mother sings her twisted lullaby.
I want to bleed forever,
bleed out my sorrow.
I can't even bear
the thought of tomorrow.
I want this nightmare to end.
I'll close my eyes to the world.
I've been begging for death
since I was a little girl.
2.
How could all this damage
come from such trusted lips?
You throw words like stones.
My heart is breaking glass.
The key you held is the knife you twist.
3.
Nowhere to hide
in the dark of the night.
Sometimes the only comfort we find
is in our own pain….
They'll never understand the calm
of relinquishing all control.
Suffering takes less courage
than it takes to be content.
I didn't choose the less traveled path
of love, joy, and luck.
I chose the other path
and now I am stuck.
I'm a prisoner of the dark in my eyes.
* * *
Let us take stock of a few harsh facts that are part and parcel of life, not only Melyssa's or mine, but everyone's.
a) The human potential for greatness – great learning and nobility, and great accomplishments – is matched only by the human potential for the reverse. Yes, humans can be and sometimes are monstrously poor-spirited, narrow-minded, and black-hearted, among other despicable traits. These traits may involve genetic or environmental factors that predispose to them, but ultimately they are the fault of the individuals who give free rein to them. The unfortunate thing is, these individuals are a source of suffering not only to themselves but also to those who are at their mercy. Among their victims are children, women, and elderly or disabled people. Actually, even the strongest of men can suffer as a result of falling prey to them. Yet, the others are more vulnerable – especially children who often make the dreadful mistake of blaming themselves for the abuse or neglect to which they are subjected.
b) As a rule, people are neither great nor bad in the extreme. They are relatively friendly and helpful – if you treat them fairly – and they lead decent though imperfect lives. Having said this, they have minds of their own, which may not be in keeping with yours. A man may fall in love with a woman who doesn't care a whit about him, and vice versa. A job seeker may hope for employment at some outfit, where in his opinion he belongs, and have his application turned down by an employer who sees things in a different light. These two examples count among an infinity of possible ones that testify to the same truth: Other people's wishes and yours often differ and you must then (out of respect) compromise or abstain from doing as you please.
c) On a positive note, there is some degree of harmony between nature's purpose and that of humans. As harsh as our life is on earth, we can subsist or even thrive. Yet, this harmony does not alter the fact that both purposes are distinct, always in danger of being opposite. Just think about the amount of resourcefulness and adaptability we must show to indeed thrive. At best the harmony is labored and confined within narrow limits. Think also about the number of times nature's purpose and that of humans clash, as demonstrated by all manner of nuisances, illnesses, and disasters. In short, the relationship we have with nature is like the relationship some people have with wild animals they have tamed. These animals are pleasant pets provided their needs are catered for. Still, they can turn against their owners for no apparent reason, except that they are fundamentally wild.
As I pointed out earlier, wisdom starts with a willingness to tackle the harsh reality of life head-on. It is the reverse of ignorance, and hence is exclusive of the illusory bliss that accompanies this ignorance. If happiness is possible through wisdom, it is achieved with the full knowledge and acceptance of the harsh reality in question. By acceptance I do not mean a passive resignation toward the status quo in all its harshness. I mean a brave readiness to turn our situation – possibly bad in a number of respects – to good account. And this includes bettering what we are able to better, while making do with everything else.
Easier said than done, of course. But then happiness is not about what is easy; it is about what is good and right and can only be accomplished through a great deal of meritorious effort. To make or not to make this effort is the question, which sums up human freedom. And surely nobody in their right mind would forever take the easy option that leads to unworthiness and unhappiness!
~ ~ ~
That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy!
23 May 2005
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PRACTICAL TIPS TO DEAL WITH THE NITTY-GRITTY OF LIFE
In the previous issue – with the help of my brother Pierre – I have zeroed in on the fundamentals; namely, the limits of knowledge and the meaning of life. Just as we cannot build a solid house without first building solid foundations, we cannot devise a satisfying life scheme without first devising a satisfying philosophy that frames the activities of our daily living in terms of human purpose within the context of a meaningful worldview. This philosophy is theoretical knowledge that puts practical knowledge in its proper perspective. It provides an answer to this pivotal question: Why live, and more precisely, why make the effort to survive, work, raise children and assist others in their own living venture? The rest is evidently important and yet secondary (from a philosophical viewpoint according to which life without meaning is not worth living). It is about the nitty-gritty of life and the concrete means of turning our situation, here and now, to good account.
Here are three articles from two life coaches who specialize in practical advice with a view to more effective and happy living.
Life Management Skills for Greater Happiness,
By Christina Winsey-Rudd
“Circumstances are the rulers of the weak; they are but the instruments of the wise.” ~ Samuel Lover
One of the most common complaints people have these days is that their plate is fuller than full. The demands of modern life often leaves some people feeling dragged out and inadequate. Many people know intellectually that they can’t give 100% to everything, yet still they have unreasonable expectations for themselves. As a result “something’s gotta give,” and usually, it is their self-care & personal fulfillment.
See if this sounds like something you might be saying to yourself. “Life just seems to be whizzing by me, and I don’t really feel as though I’m spending enough quality time on the things that matter most to me. I worry a lot that I’m going to somehow miss my life and then it will be over.”
Life’s demands may not slow up any time soon, and learning to balance life is an ongoing art. If you think one day you will “get it all done, and then you can relax,” you are bound to be disappointed.
So then how can we insure that those things of greatest importance to us get the amount of attention they deserve? Consider the following absolute basic life management skills.
Number one: Identify the top four priority categories in your life (i.e., spirituality/personal development, family/relationship, career, personal care/health) and honestly assess how much time you give to each category.
Often people have expectations of themselves that are unreasonable given the amount of time they actually have to devote to something. If, for example, you are giving only 50% of your time to career, it is truly unreasonable to expect yourself to be a superstar in that category. Additionally, if kids and family are a top priority to you, giving only 50% to career is probably the max you can give and still have enough time and energy left over.
Number two: Write things down! Don’t use your brain as your day planner. Doing so increases stress. Consider making five separate “to do” lists. The first four lists correlate with your four top priority life categories (from our example above, one for spirituality/personal development, one for family/relationships, one for career/work and one for personal care/health). Then the fifth list would be for general “to do’s” that don’t fit into those top four categories.
From these lists make sure you schedule the important items in your priority categories FIRST, BEFORE anything else makes it onto your calendar. As a result you won’t have to worry whether you’re making time for priorities. Then you can pick and choose from your general to do list which additional activities you may need to, have to or (actually want to), fit in. By the way, don’t be afraid to use that good word “no” to any time-robbers you identify!
Number three: Practice being in the present moment only. Let’s say you’re always thinking about your endless pile of work at the office when you’re home with the family. Fact is there is absolutely nothing you can do about those things on your desk. Worrying about it takes precious time and attention away from your priorities and increases your feelings of dissatisfaction about life.
It takes practice and some mental self-control to keep your attention on what’s happening in the present moment, but this tip alone will bring huge rewards. When you savor the series of life moments one by one, you will find you don’t feel as though you’re missing out.
Be patient and loving with yourself. Always remember, life is an ongoing process and it will throw you curve balls from time to time. But with practice, you will find coming back to equilibrium gets quicker & easier. As a result, you will enjoy life more and have a more consistent experience of happiness.
Boosting Your Success with Six Easy Happiness Tips,
By Christina Winsey-Rudd
In what areas of your life would you like to achieve greater success? State-of-mind (attitude towards life and work) absolutely affects your performance and your outcomes. People who stay in jobs they hate, or relationships and situations in which they are chronically unhappy are not only missing out on the joy life has to offer, but are literally putting their health at risk at the same time.
When coaching clients I ask them to do a rough pre-assessment: on a scale of one to ten, ten being that you are consistently happy with your day-to-day life 90-95% of the time, where do you rank? If the answer is five or six, here are some tips and techniques to boost it up.
Live by your definition of happiness and success. Many people feel an ongoing sense of dissatisfaction with their lives or businesses because they are using someone else’s “happiness measuring stick.” Comparing your life and achievements to those of others, and using their criteria rather than yours is a sure fire way to lose the happiness game.
Take “happiness breaks” using a “fun and joy list.” Many people don’t realize how much more productive they can be by feeding their souls and hearts throughout the workday. Lunch hour not withstanding, 10-15 minute “happiness breaks” are real attitude and brain-boosters. A checklist prevents you from saying “I wouldn’t even know what to do with myself if I took a break from work.”
Become a Pollyanna! Pollyanna, contrary to popular opinion, wasn’t teaching denial, or pie in the sky positive thinking. Rather she perfected a mind-set of learned optimism and of seeing the glass “half full.” Pollyanna’s “Glad Game” turned around an entire town from being gloomy and pessimistic to being a happy, joyful place.
Not only will your sunny outlook help you be happier more of the time, but also your “vibes” will positively affect those around you. If you’re single, keeping a sunny disposition will make your “vibe” much more attractive. People like to be around upbeat people who make them feel good.
If you’re in sales, or are looking to climb a success ladder, you will be much more attractive to your ideal employer or ideal customer if your attitude is obviously an optimistic and happy one.
Have better relationships by living from both head and heart. Being too rigid and intellectual can really wreck the relationship “happiness quotient.” The people in your life, just like you, want to hear expressed appreciation and to be given more understanding.
Sadly, it seems much easier in our society for people to express disappointment, criticism and negative observations than it does the positive ones. Speak words of encouragement and appreciation freely.
Ask for acknowledgement when you need it too. People can’t (HEAR THIS – THEY ABSOLUTELY CAN’T) read your mind. When you give and take freely of appreciation, understanding, praise, joy and fun in relationships they are bound to flourish.
On the business side of things, you will be seen as a premier team player when you contribute to your business relationships in this way.
Stay in the here and now. When coaching clients, one of the most frequent things I hear is “When I achieve this goal I will finally be happy.” Life isn’t happening “then.” Life is happening right NOW!
Make a habit of slowing things down. Savor those good people, experiences and feelings in the very moment you are experiencing them. While you are experiencing them and noticing them, inwardly say a thought of gratitude that you have this person, job, experience, feeling, or talent.
Whatever it is that you are enjoying, it will stay with you longer throughout the day if you don’t let it fly by without acknowledgement. At the end of the day, as you review it, if you’ve really practiced this “here and now happiness,” the overall feeling about your day will be a good one.
When negatives come along, the fact that you have spent time practicing this “here and now happiness” will make it a great deal easier to wade through them without overreacting.
Quiet your negative self-talk. Many people are completely unaware of the numerous negative things they may say to themselves throughout the day. The fact is that, like criticism of others, negative self-talk never ever helped anyone perform better.
Become your own detective. Carry a little notebook around with you and whenever you are aware of some negative thoughts running through your mind write them down. Then consciously and deliberately refute the negative thought with some positive observations.
What if you were to stop those thoughts as if you were a policeman with a whistle and immediately bring on the flow of positive self-compliments? Pick all the good characteristics both about your looks and about you as a person; begin to acknowledge them emphatically.
Here again, when you love and appreciate yourself for what’s good, your “vibes” will be good ones and people will like being around you. In fact, they will begin to think and feel about you the way you do. When you value yourself, the world does too!
These are just a few ways you can enhance the quality of your happiness experience and your life. Get creative and begin thinking of your own solutions! They will pay big dividends.
"Go for the moon. If you don't get it, you'll still be heading for a star." ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt
Dr. Christina Winsey-Rudd is an esteemed life coach, speaker and writer (http://www.dynamicgoldmindstrategies.com / Email: info@dynamicgoldmindstrategies.com).
Simple Pleasures: Ingredients to Feed Your Spirit,
By Nancy Bishop
"When we do something we love, again and again, our life comes to hold the fragrance of that thing." ~ Wayne Mullen
Cold air slips through the cracks in my doorway and around my windows. My cats lie curled up in balls, asleep on plump pillows. They hibernate most days now and only awaken from their dreamy slumbers for bites of kibble. They are unaware of our troops in the Middle East or our economy problems here at home.
What sustains you during tough times? Do you have a network of support? What are the things that comfort you when life seems to be filling your plate with more of the things you find unappetizing? Now is the perfect time to focus on simple daily rituals and pleasures as we live through more turbulent days ahead. Let's call these, recipes for rapture.
Every good recipe must include the right ingredients. Perhaps, it's buying flowers each week to put in your home or on your desk at work. Most grocery stores have flowers available and you can include these weekly flowers as part of the menu for "feeding" your spirit. Maybe, it's taking a break from watching the news or reading the newspaper. Instead, listen to some music that you find particularly soothing. Try keeping a dream journal to capture your dreams or create a personal altar in the corner of a room. You can mix and match 'ingredients' according to your particular taste. The key is to create a recipe that is authentically soul-satisfying to you. For me, it's cups of tea, a daily walk, and watching birds at my window feeder.
Or, be like cats. Take long naps. Choose the most comfortable and warmest of spots, preferably in sunshine and curled up next to someone. Stretch daily and, when it's warm enough, go outside for a little fresh air. Watch birds for entertainment. Play everyday. Make sure you have lots of toys available. Get a good cat scratch especially along the back.
To create a 'purrrrfect' life fill yours with plenty of simple pleasures and daily rituals that bring you comfort and joy.
Nancy Bishop is also an esteemed life coach, speaker and writer (http://www.yourlifeyourway.com).
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That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy!
22 April 2005
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Previous issue:
DECONSTRUCTION AND CONSTRUCTION
Assuredly, the most beneficial pieces of philosophical writing are also the most unconventional. Their bold way of shedding light on the nature of things and of casting doubt on traditional concepts are conducive to advancement, but not comfort. Only the brave will learn, while the remainder will stay complacently ensconced in the well-padded La-Z-Boy of shortsighted convictions.
My brother, Pierre Grenier (teacher of literature and ancient languages, and philosopher), is one of those penetrating and inquiring minds in the presence of which no worldview is safe. He reminds me of gifted children who cannot resist dismantling every mechanical – either functioning or malfunctioning – object within reach to discover their workings or shortcomings. They are the pride of their parents that they drive mad nonetheless. The lawnmower can no longer cut grass, and the clock is not keeping time anymore.
Rest assured that my brother, of whom I am evidently proud, is not driving me mad. If anything he is driving me glad. I take great pleasure in challenging my own views in the light of his, which lean towards deconstruction and prepare the way for a wiser reconstruction.
Featured below is a piece of writing by him that illustrates this auspicious leaning. I invite you to read it with the careful attention it deserves. I also invite you to ponder on my reply, in the hope that this effort will contribute to the building of your own mental construction, preferably both akin to reality and delightfully habitable.
Ways and meanings, by Pierre Grenier
Today, I would like to examine briefly the proposition that life – or more globally the world – might be its own purpose. It is certainly difficult not to agree with this. The idea of a destination beyond life itself seems to be an utter fiction, a religious or philosophical artifact devised to screen off the stern fact of death. We’re ready to buy any ticket, however counterfeit it appears to be, to travel beyond this point.
But as we cannot easily come to terms with the understanding that reality is an open process and not a stock of static entities, we smuggle the immobility of death into the beyond to make it a place of rest, an eternal harbor to cast anchor in.
Kant was more consistent in conceiving immortality as a never-ending process. Being and rest exclude each other. If death is a kind of singularity where all the functions of life vanish, it remains to be seen whether death is a boundary point or not. A reasonable assumption is that the laws underlying the process of being hold in any region bordering or surrounding this point.
This is why the Christian doctrine of resurrection can seem to be more in keeping with the corporal nature of life as we know it than the platonic conception of the survival of the soul. But the apparent agreement of this doctrine with the centrality of the body to any conceivable form of life only highlights its inconsistency with the physical nature of any conceivable body. It goes against the material and temporal conditions of our existence and of our personal identity. How can such a flight out of this world mean anything at all?
The believer, however, will say that this is precisely what faith is all about: it takes us out of the world where we must go the way of all things and gives us the power to go upstream to the source of being. But our reason, even though it is well aware of its own limitations, finds it hard to accept this. For its function is to make sense of the world, to explore and organize it, not to find a way out of it.
The alternative seems clear enough: the only possible agreement between faith and reason is the full and mutual acceptance of their separation. Either one or the other. More specifically, if we are ready to go beyond the limits of reason we must be consistent with our forsaking it and not try to extort arguments from it to justify our belief. So much for theology!
One cannot help feeling that rationality is on the safe side of the alternative. Safety may well be what rationality is all about for that matter: as part of a living organism, reason is fundamentally an adaptive system. The original meaning of true is “firm, trustworthy, safe.” Verus in Latin and wahr in German can be derived from the indo-European root wer that signifies exactly the same thing.
So we might as well stay on this side of truth – maybe the only one, in fact, with a Möbius strip twist – and try to make sense of the world as it is: self-contained, with no outside. But then, we must be aware of the fact that the notions of meaning and purpose, when applied to the world as a whole, become irrelevant: meaning always involves a reference to something else. The words that we use can be meaningful because they refer, however indirectly, to the world out there.
But the world as such doesn’t mean anything beyond itself, so it doesn’t mean anything at all; it simply is. This also holds true for life taken as a whole, even if that whole were to include another life beyond this one. If we insist on giving it a global meaning, it can only signify something other than itself, namely something which is not life.
The question about the ultimate or absolute meaning of life is self-contradictory and therefore pointless, since whatever we qualify as absolute must be self-referential. Meaning is relative because it is a relational process; it arises on the way from here to there, from the present to the past or to the future and from me to you. Making sense of the world is a creative adventure that enables us to go beyond ourselves toward an end which defines what we live for.
One of the most significant features of the revealed religions lies in the fact that they involve a relational conception of God. Through his word, God is on the way to His creation. The Christian doctrine of Trinity inscribes otherness and relationship in the innermost circle of His essence. He is one in three. Coming and going to Himself through the relations of each person with the other two and with the created world.
I am not concerned here with the problem of the existence of such a God. Hegel’s philosophy was probably the best attempt to translate this conception into the language of rationality. But I’m fascinated by the ethical relevance of the Trinitarian idea: meaning isn’t contained in anything, but it moves between all things in the interstices of being.
Tentative answers to fundamental questions, by Laurent Grenier
“…the only possible agreement between faith and reason is the full and mutual acceptance of their separation.” P. G.
“…meaning isn’t contained in anything, but it moves between all things in the interstices of being.” P. G.
The intellectual value of my brother’s article partly lies in its logical rigor. All too often, the quest for truth – which admittedly can only yield a qualified success in the best case scenario – is tainted with laxity and fancifulness, and hence is doomed to a pitiable result, not to say failure.
Strangely enough, Blaise Pascal, a famous mathematician and philosopher, is also the eccentric author of a wager according to which the belief in God (or more precisely in heaven as a divine reward for virtue) is defensible to the extent that it is desirable, even though it cannot be proven. Actually, it is supposedly defensible because not only cannot it be proven, it also cannot be disproven. So desirableness is considered a valid foundation for belief, absent provableness and disprovableness! The door is open to every wild fancy, as long as we lack the empirical means of discrediting it.
— Who have you invited to dinner, dear?
— Some fabulous folks, my love.
— Great! And who exactly are these folks?
— I don’t know, but they’re fabulous.
— Hum! How can you say they’re fabulous if you don’t know them?
— Our neighbor across the road told me so.
— Forgive me for asking, dear, but isn't that neighbor somewhat loopy? The story about angels watching over us sounds like wishful thinking to me.
— This loopy neighbor, as you say, is more fun to listen to than your professor friends, with all due respect.
— But don't you think…
— Forget about thinking; I’m in the mood for a dinner with some fabulous folks.
(If you feel this is a bit of sexist humor, note that I have made no mention of genders. The prejudices that offend us are sometimes very much our own. Remember also that Blaise Pascal was a man.)
Personally, I am not willing to forget about thinking. However attractive a claim may be, this attractiveness must be accompanied by credibleness – which is a function of provableness and trustworthiness – before I let it shape my view and govern my life. When credibleness is wanting, I reserve judgment until further notice and meanwhile accept reality as it appears to be, judging from facts and solid arguments, even if this appearance is not consistent with a so-called ideal world. Call me austere (not ready to indulge in the luxury of extravagant beliefs), a man of reason who associates his intellectual austerity with intellectual integrity.
Having said this, the reverse attitude is common, especially in matters that are beyond the realm of experience and hence can neither be proven nor disproven. For example, as regards their future – here below or in the hereafter – many do not reserve judgment or keep their minds open to all possibilities, ranging from disastrous to glorious. Instead they believe a heavenly tale because they fancy believing it and often also because a charismatic fortuneteller or spiritual leader, allegedly endowed with supernatural powers, is the originator of this tale.
In its wildest and blindest form, optimism coupled with faith is illustrative of this attitude. Is it fanciful and naïve, or even foolish? I am tempted to say yes, and yet I will resist this temptation. There is no denying that the inveterate optimists-believers derive significant enjoyment from seeing their future through rose-colored spectacles. In view of this enjoyment, a sophisticated better like Blaise Pascal will argue that these spectacles are worth wearing, at the risk of laboring under a delusion. I myself lack the grace or the guile of innocent or calculating souls to whom ignorance is bliss.
I am all the stauncher as a committed realist since life in itself – without fables and despite the adversities that are part and parcel of it – has meaning to my mind. Furthermore, I contend that religion (as a provider of a questionable but meaningful myth that makes a blissful afterlife the purpose of life) is often a poor substitute for wisdom. It is designed to offset the feeling of dissatisfaction that shadows the foolish if often profound concept of existential absurdity. The more deficient in wisdom, the more avid for religion (as defined above) one is.
Now, what is the content of this wisdom, or what is the meaning of life within the limits of life? I have answered this question to the best of my ability in my book A REASON FOR LIVING; and my answer – like any answer to this question – is sure to be both at odds and in keeping with yours. But then, the antithesis of statements and disagreements can usefully stimulate the intellect to resolve the oppositions and achieve a new and superior synthesis.
Be that as it may, this antithesis betrays the imperfection of individual wisdoms. At best, they are true up to a point, and we can persistently overpass this point while the complete truth indefinitely recedes like the horizon as we advance toward it. There are as many wisdoms as there are individuals; nevertheless their subjectiveness admits of much intersubjectiveness or deep intellectual kinship.
Let us explore a number of cardinal facts and logical assumptions based on facts.
1) The observable universe is the obvious manifestation of a tendency toward order. Ordered things and beings (that show their attraction for a particular inert or living state), ordered behaviors and thoughts (that aim at specific achievements and feelings in preference to others), all this testifies to the tendency in question, which can be called the principle of universal order. The oneness of this principle is not merely nominal. It is fundamental, as demonstrated by the unitary if complex human nature, which comprises every physical and nonphysical aspect of the observable universe.
2) The observation of the universe relates to observers: humans, in the present instance. It is limited to the observable manifestations of this universe, or provides a basis for knowledge only within the limits of these manifestations. Everything beyond these limits – that is, everything that is not observably manifest – transcends our ability to know it. Nevertheless, as Kant pointed out, our inability to know it does not suppress our curiosity. Whereas some accept the limits of knowledge, many don’t. Their effort to penetrate the transcendental mystery ought to yield nothing except fancy.
3) There are, however, various degrees of fancy. At one extreme, fancy is grossly unfounded or rests on the highly suspicious claims of inspired visionaries regarding the great beyond. At the other extreme, fancy is very much tempered with reason. It is reminiscent of poetry, which assimilates certain things to kindred things through metaphors and similes.
Take for example the predictions of learned and intuitive futurists about the distant future of humanity. They clearly overstep the limits of knowledge, and yet they are believable to the extent that they are conceivable, given the way this knowledge represents humans and the world they inhabit. Take also for example the conjectures of learned and intuitive philosophers about the intimate nature of nonhuman beings or things beyond their observable characteristics. Like the above-mentioned predictions, they clearly overstep the limits of knowledge, and yet they are believable to the extent that they are conceivable, given the way this knowledge represents humans and nonhuman beings or things.
4) With respect to our human nature, observations include introspections and reveal both the spiritual and material aspects of this nature. Since we measure the value of life in terms of pleasure (sensual, intellectual, or moral), it is safe to say that the spiritual aspect is preeminent.
By underscoring the pleasure principle in moral matters, I imply that even the most edifying proof of nobility comprises an element of self-interest. Indeed, nobility is an ideal in the pursuit of which the noble soul takes pleasure – not the low sort of pleasure that one derives from such activities as feasting on a palatable dish or having intercourse with a seductive lover, but the most elevated sort. Therefore, self-interest and nobility are not mutually exclusive. When they come together, the former is exalted by the latter.
5) As we fathom our human nature, we ultimately acknowledge the principle of universal order as the essence of our being, which can normally acquire habits – of thought or behavior – that are conducive to well-being. And so gratitude adds to the acknowledgment, though misery may reverse this attitude when it plagues us despite ourselves.
Why such misery? There is no answer to this question. We can ascertain the possibility of misery; we cannot explain it. Saying that the principle of universal order is such as to permit the occurrence of misery is like saying that misery is because it can be, which is no explanation. In short, misery is a mystery; and the best we can do is fight and overcome it, or resign ourselves to it when it is insuperable.
Actually, we can do better. We can regard misery as a precious opportunity for courage and merit, whereas an absolutely blissful and effortless life would require no courage and hence afford no merit.
But what about extreme cases where we are truly miserable and helpless? We can then take comfort from the knowledge that the principle of universal order is the essence of our being. Each of us is a single human incarnation of this principle among countless other like incarnations, which offer the prospect of a meritorious happiness through considerable effort.
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That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy!
5 April 2005
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Previous issue:
SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST
In the old days the world of journalism, literature, and philosophy was a small community of privileged and educated individuals who informed, entertained, and enlightened the people with their words, usually printed in the form of periodicals and books. This small world was to the world at large as a few monasteries, high in the mountains, are to the multitude of laypersons in the land below, some of whom visit these monasteries at various intervals for intellectual and spiritual nourishment.
Today, the world of journalism, literature, and philosophy is huge, even monstrous. Not that it has grown particularly awful, though it is littered with garbage and inferior material; it has mostly overgrown.
First, journalists, writers, and thinkers – who now include in their ranks a staggering number of more or less knowledgeable individuals from all walks of life who fancy using their leisure time to inform, entertain, and enlighten others – abound beyond measure.
Second, their means of making their words public are numerous in the extreme, thanks to technological advances. Among these means is the sprawling and ever-growing Internet where everyone is free to print anything (news, stories, or thoughts) online. The quantity of written material available for reading is inconceivably and dizzyingly massive.
The fact remains that there is a demand for informative, entertaining, and enlightening pieces of writing. This demand, however, is relatively limited. The readers’ capacity or willingness to read (and be informed, entertained, or enlightened) is out of proportion to everything there is to read. It follows from this disproportion that everything there is to read is competing for the readers’ attention, and nothing but the best is likely to hold it.
For more than twenty years I have striven to rank among the best; that is, among those who by virtue of their literary and philosophical excellence usefully hold people's attention. If you have read my newsletter until this point, I guess this is a sign my efforts have not been in vain.
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TO THINK FOR ONESELF
“I know that you, ladies and gentlemen, have a philosophy… and that the most interesting and important thing about you is the way in which it determines the perspective in your several worlds...” William James.
Let us examine the three purposes of writing: to inform, entertain, and enlighten. To me, the second one is bottom of the list, though it is instrumental in the achievement of the two others. Every great teacher knows this intimately and readily laces his teachings with relevant and interesting stories, and humor.
The first purpose, to inform, comes second in my mind, whereas the last, to enlighten, comes first. To explain my attitude, I think it appropriate to draw your attention to my book A REASON FOR LIVING, where both of these purposes are pursued.
Part of my book relays factual or theoretical information about things like human physiology, nutrition, and universal evolution. This information relates to the current perception of reality in scientific circles. I am just a vehicle for it. Now, for two reasons, my role as a writer who informs his readers about scientific facts and theories comes second in my mind to my role as a thinker who strives to enlighten his readers.
My main reason is that I regard wisdom as paramount, whereas the knowledge of the material world (i.e., the constituents, structure, and workings thereof) is not equally important, however useful it is on a practical level. Conscience comes before science, which in itself is incapable of providing humans with a sense of what is good, right, or sacred – in a word, with moral principles. An example of science without conscience is the destruction of nature and the violation of human rights by rogue companies who are efficient in their use, or rather abuse, of their environment and their workers to satisfy their greed.
My other reason is that my role as a writer who informs his readers about scientific facts and theories is indeed that of a mere vehicle. It is very much secondary to the role of researcher, which drives the scientific enterprise thanks to advanced instrumentation plus skillful, scholarly, and clever observations and rationalizations.
By contrast, my role as a thinker who strives to enlighten his readers is in the driver's seat, so to speak. Not only is it concerned with everything that makes life worth living and gives humans a sense of purpose, but also it does more than mirror the light of wisdom; it generates it by force of thinking on the basis of experience and study.
Truth to tell, my readers can likewise think for themselves. They themselves can be thinkers and create their own wisdom while discovering and evaluating mine. Therefore, the light shining through in my book is there to help my readers see a range of weighty matters on which they can meditate to form their own thoughtful opinions about them. And since they can do so, I venture to argue that they should.
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WORDS OF WISDOM
“Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and some few to be chewed and digested; that is, some books are to be read only in parts; others to be read but not curiously; and some few to be read wholly, and with diligence and attention. Some books may also be read by deputy, and extracts made of them by others.” ~ Francis Bacon, Essays.
“No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.” ~ William Blake, Proverbs of Hell.
“A good book is the purest essence of a human soul.” ~ Thomas Carlyle, Speech.
“One joy dispels a hundred cares.” ~ Confucius.
“The superior man thinks always of virtue; the common man… of comfort. ~ Confucius.
“Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits.” ~ Thomas A. Edison.
“What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight; it's the size of the fight in the dog.” ~ Dwight Eisenhower.
“Hitch your wagon to a star. Let us not fag in paltry works which serve our pot and bag alone. Let us not lie and steal. No god will help. We shall find all their teams going the other way: every god will leave us. Work rather for those interests which the divinities honor and promote – justice, love, freedom, knowledge, utility.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson, Society and Solitude.
“True philosophers who are burning with love for truth and learning never see themselves… as wise men, brimfull of knowledge… For most of them would admit that even the very greatest number of things of which we know is only equal to the very smallest fraction of things of which we are ignorant. Nor are these philosophers so addicted to any kind of tradition or doctrine that they suffer themselves to become their slaves, and thus lose their liberty.” ~ William Harvey.
“We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about.” ~ Charles Kingsley.
“He who knows much about others may be learned, but he who understands himself is wiser. He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still.” ~ Lao-Tsu. Tao Teh King.
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That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy!
23 February 2005
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Previous issue:
HAPPINESS
Pierre Grenier – teacher of literature and ancient languages, philosopher, and dear brother of mine: “’Where there's a will there's a way.’ The practical value of such a statement is obvious but the way it refers to is devious: one never really knows where it leads to. Happiness is part of this uncertainty; it simply happens here and there along the way, it is an event and an experience, not a state you can will yourself into. I see it as a gift, by which word I do not mean only a talent, a natural or acquired disposition to enjoy life and make the most of it, but also something which is given to us in the byways of the unexpected: circumstance is of the essence. But on the other hand, receiving and giving must match each other and even change into each other: how could one get the best out of life without giving it the best welcome? Much of our happiness depends on our ability to rise to the occasion and to live up to the unexpected possibilities it reveals. Happiness eludes our will, but our good will can make us worthy of it, as Kant says, and ready to receive it when it comes our way.”
L. G.: For a start, happiness must be better defined. If we mean by it a state of fulfillment, when everything is going our way, in terms of results as well as efforts (which requires a providential combination of pluck and luck), then it cannot simply be willed; it is partly, if not largely, a gift of fate.
Having said this, even this sort of happiness is a product of positive thinking and positive action, with good fortune lending a helping hand. In short, it is a product of will in relatively favorable circumstances. But isn't it peculiar to imply that happiness can be of one sort or another? Are there not simply happiness and unhappiness? I think not. The sort of happiness that the sage talks about is compatible with misfortune. It is preeminently a doing from within – while without, the only prerequisite for it is that the sage be alive and capable of thought. It is a feeling of serenity, of being at peace with his situation and his conscience, as a well-adjusted and fully committed servant of life, of humanity, of God as he sees them.
However conscious he is of the subjectiveness – i.e., the individual limitations and hence the imperfection – of his view, he does live by it with utmost faithfulness, if also with a willingness to reevaluate it critically when he catches himself out in a misstep. His wisdom is forever a work in progress; it is always laced with some form of foolishness, which leaves him open to ridicule. Humility and compassion, plus humor are therefore qualities that he cultivates. He mocks and forgives himself, and above all strives to improve. He shows no complacency, but an acceptance of his humanness that he is intent on bringing to the highest possible degree of truth and nobility. And this delicate blend of resignation and struggle alone – in any situation, favorable or not – is indeed the secret of his happiness, which admittedly is a dry manner of joy that fills the mind rather than the heart.
It follows that this happiness leaves something to be desired: happiness in the fullest sense of the word (a state of fulfillment, when everything is going our way, in terms of results as well as efforts), which is a joy, ever so sweet, that fills both the mind and the heart. When the sage experiences this supreme happiness, he rightly feels blessed, and knows how precarious it is. Furthermore, he accepts this precariousness, or the fact that suffering and ultimately death loom ahead. Only battles are won in the war of life that will inevitably – despite every valiant effort to prevail – end in defeat.
Some will say that happiness in its so-called fullest sense leaves something more to be desired: the power to make this happiness infinite: immeasurably great and unlimited in duration. Among them, some will choose the path of faith, which allegedly leads to a heavenly afterlife, whereas some will choose the path of reason, which admits of no rosy belief based on wishful thinking and unbridled trust. This path leads nowhere as far as the beyond is concerned, or rather somewhere that is unknown – presumably so different from what is known that it totally exceeds our ability to conceive of its nature.
I count among these proponents of reason, these infidels, to whom the only source of meaning is not a paradisiacal destination, whose existence is supported by no credible evidence, but the journey itself, a rugged and uphill journey to be sure, with an abundance of twists and turns, some of which are propitious, others not. This journey is well worth the trouble, in my opinion. It is so independently of the above-mentioned destination, which people are free to pursue blindly or regard with skepticism (and with detachment to boot, in the best case scenario). It is all about the dignity of living and loving and the pleasure of succeeding in these difficult assignments. From this perspective, the purpose of life is none other than life itself, in partnership with our fellow creatures; and happiness is made possible – within certain limits – by our striving to achieve this worthy, albeit humble purpose.
The limits imposed upon worldly happiness may initially stick in our craw, but after due consideration, as we realize that life without these limits would be death, we accept them, and better still we welcome them. Life is by definition a dynamic state that presupposes a perpetual tension between desires and their satisfaction. Render this satisfaction absolute, you resolve this tension and consequently reduce life to nothing; i.e., something as inert as a stone. And this nothing – this inert something – is death, as I just pointed out. Not a brilliant prospect in the eyes of a life lover!
P. G.: Happiness is rather elusive, in the realm of ideas as well as in real life. But you're a good bird-catcher, and if I were a bird of paradise, I should keep away from the trees of your en- chanted forest, unless, of course, I wanted to be caught, which I admit might be just the case: birds of a feather...
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HAPPY QUOTES
"Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by doubling our joys and dividing our grief." ~ Joseph Addison
"Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for." ." ~ Joseph Addison
"The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature." ~ Marcus Aurelius
"A man's life is what his thoughts make of it." ~ Marcus Aurelius
"To live happily is an inward power of the soul." ~ Marcus Aurelius
"Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy." ~ Robert Anthony
"Men… their gladness is not the taking and holding, but in doing, the striving, the building, the living. It is a higher joy to teach than to be taught. It is good to get justice, but better to do it; fun to have things but more to make them. The happy man is he who lives the life of love, not for the honors it may bring, but for the life itself." ~ R.J. Baughan
"So much sadness exists in the world that we are all under obligation to contribute as much joy as lies within our powers." ~ John Sutherland Bonnell
"Happiness includes chiefly the idea of satisfaction after full honest effort. No one can possibly be satisfied and no one can be happy who feels that in some paramount affairs he failed to take up the challenge of life." ~ Arnold Bennett
"Happiness is the real sense of fulfillment that comes from hard work." ~ Joseph Barbara (in Success Secrets of Super Achievers by Stovall)
"Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response." ~ Mildred Barthel
"The truth is that all of us attain the greatest success and happiness possible in this life whenever we use our native capacities to their greatest extent." ~ Smiley Blanton
“Find a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life." ~ Confucius
"Slow down and enjoy life. It's not only the scenery you miss by going too fast, you also miss the sense of where you are going and why." ~ Eddie Cantor
"Happiness is a journey, not a destination; happiness is to be found along the way not at the end of the road, for then the journey is over and it's too late. The time for happiness is today, not tomorrow." ~ Quoted by Paul H Dunn
"A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes." ~ Hugh Downs
"Happiness is like those palaces in fairy tales whose gates are guarded by dragons: we must fight in order to conquer it." ~ Alexandre Dumas
"Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one's own sunshine." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
"It is one of the beautiful compensations of life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will." ~ Epictetus
"If thou wilt make a man happy, add not unto his riches but take away from his desires." ~ Epicurus
"A great obstacle to happiness is to expect too much happiness." ~ Fontenelle
"Happiness makes up in height what it lacks in length" ~ Robert Frost
"I really think happiness is very closely aligned with success, and may almost be an interchangeable synonym. Happiness (like success) also comes from doing what we feel called to do in life; however, it's also obvious no one can experience one without the other." ~ Donna Fargo (in Success Secrets of Super Achievers by Stovall)
"The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself." ~ Ben Franklin
"Sadness is but a wall between two gardens" ~ Kahlil Gibran
"True happiness involves the full use of one's power and talents." ~ John W. Gardner
"Happiness consists in activity. It is a running stream, not a stagnant pool." ~ John Mason Good
"Success is getting what you want, happiness is wanting what you get." ~ Dave Gardner
“Happiness is not an end in itself. It is a by-product of working, playing, loving and living." ~ Haim Ginott
"If frugality were established in the state, and if our expenses were laid out to meet needs rather than superfluities of life, there might be fewer wants, and even fewer pleasures, but infinitely more happiness." ~ Oliver Goldsmith
~ ~ ~
That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy!
11 March 2005
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Previous issue:
A REASON FOR LIVING in a nutshell
In brief, my book A REASON FOR LIVING is the product of a sustained effort to answer in the most enlightening and inspiring way this single question: Why live? I started to ask myself that question about thirty years ago after my diving accident, which left the husky and lusty teenage athlete that I was a near quadriplegic. What had given meaning to my life until then had become largely impossible. As a result, my life seemed absurd.
“Seemed” is the operative word here. Many years of reflection and study have taught me that the lack of meaning is always a lack of wisdom. Everything I have learned and that has turned the bitter and suicidal young man that I was into a mature and serene life lover is what I impart to my reader.
Listed below are some of the major points in my book:
1. There can be no contentment without acceptance of the limits of reality, within which excellence and joy are possible, but not perfection and infinite happiness. Furthermore, there can be no contentment without the courage to pursue excellence and joy persistently, against failures and misfortunes.
Above all, our minds are at our command and determine our moods. Independently of circumstances and results, contentment follows from positive thinking and positive action – though admittedly it is not possible without circumstances and results being at least favorable enough to permit thinking and action.
2. In the pursuit of excellence and joy, the awareness of our adaptability is paramount. Change, and sometimes extensive and traumatic change, is part and parcel of life. Fortunately, we are able to adapt to this change. That is, the favorable habits we develop within relatively stable circumstances – for example eating, working, or dating habits that are conducive to our happiness – do not truly define the individuals we are. What does define them so is our innate ability to acquire favorable habits whatever the circumstances (provided the latter are not so bad that they cannot be turned to good account). In a word, we are by nature adaptable, just as the world is by nature changeable.
3. The one fact that differentiates life from infinite bliss is the struggle that is required of the living to achieve satisfaction, which is never complete and permanent. We can either sorrow over that fact or rejoice at it. Why rejoice? because with the struggle comes merit, and merit is a joyful emotion that any valiant soul knows intimately and values immensely.
4. Just as we cannot build a house without first securing a solid foundation, we cannot achieve fulfillment without first ensuring that our body is sound, thanks to a healthy diet and lifestyle.
5. To be free to do what we please is a precious right that we have as members of a liberal society. This right comes with a corresponding duty: to respect that right in others. Indeed, we are free to do what we please if what we please is not to make our fellow creatures suffer. Mutual respect is the sine qua non of collective harmony. It is the chief principle behind human justice.
The right to freedom, within the liberal society, also means that we are free to believe what we please. No institutionalized ideology is imposed on us besides the basic moral principle dictating that we respect one another so that society, however liberal, remains sufficiently ordered to be operational. The reverse of order is chaos, which only knows the law of the jungle: dog eat dog.
Now, the right to believe what we please comes with a corresponding duty: to think carefully to define our own ideology according to which we see and do things in a certain way. Again, the only imposition is the basic moral principle dictating that we respect one another.
6. Within the context of my own ideology, which I cannot impose, but only propose, love is the essence of life, its essential purpose. It includes the love of ourselves, which consists in promoting our own life. This love is instinctive and foundational; it is instrumental in the love of others, as we feel solidarity with them.
At a deeper level, love extends to that of everything. It proceeds from the divine principle behind the universe, thanks to which everything is the way it is, capable of being and better still, within certain limits, capable of flourishing. Like this principle, these limits can be ascertained through their obvious manifestations, but never explained. Ultimately, the universe and our relative knowledge of it are founded on a fathomless mystery.
Short recap:
– The lack of meaning is always a lack of wisdom.
– No contentment without acceptance of the limits of reality.
– No contentment without the courage to pursue excellence and joy persistently.
– Our minds are at our command and determine our moods.
– We are by nature adaptable, just as the world is by nature changeable.
– With the struggle comes merit.
– Ensuring that our body is sound, thanks to a healthy diet and lifestyle.
– Mutual respect is the sine qua non of collective harmony.
– To think carefully to define our own ideology.
– Love is the essence of life, its essential purpose.
– The universe and our relative knowledge of it are founded on a fathomless mystery.
~ ~ ~
THE RIGHT TO FREEDOM
We Westerners often take for granted our constitutional right to freedom. Within the limits of the law – which aims to protect people against the violation of this right – we can do and believe whatever we please. In other words, our individual right to freedom implies the right (protected by law) of everyone to freedom, which in turn implies the need for everyone to respect this right in one another. Justice in all its ramifications relates essentially to this respect like the branches of a tree to its trunk.
Many view our liberal society – which permits a multitude of behaviors and beliefs – as dangerously relativistic: devoid of any exclusive ideology or value system offering intellectual and moral guidelines to its citizens at the level of government. The danger is real, no doubt, as the youths, without these guidelines, may fumble painfully, and sometimes destructively, for a sense of what is true, right, or sacred. Freedom does have its price, and this price is the effort people must make to grow into the adults that they are meant to grow into. Now, adulthood is about thinking by oneself and acting responsibly upon the principles and views that one believes are true after due consideration. This is difficult, but necessary for one's fulfillment as an individual endowed with the ability to determine and apply his or her own way of seeing and doing things.
But actually, is it fair to say that our liberal society is entirely relativistic? Isn't the right to freedom a value and the protection of this right under the law the exercise of political authority, considered legitimate as it is sanctioned by the majority through the process of election? Indeed, liberalism is an exclusive ideology, as its tolerance is not infinite; it includes an intolerance to the violation of people’s right to freedom. Furthermore, this intolerance is a commitment to justice, in terms of respect for this right, and there is no doubt that justice with its laws constitutes a value system. Its basic purpose is to make it possible for people to live harmoniously together with a view to building a common good that infinitely surpasses the good any single individual could build independently.
In conclusion, liberalism does offer guidelines, provided we do not take its founding principle for granted to the point of being oblivious to it. It vindicates the ultimate moral value: people's right to freedom, without which their pursuit of happiness according to their perception of this fundamental goal is tragically impossible. It is radically opposed to any sort of tyranny, which puts this pursuit in the distressing chains of oppression. It is open to all forms of assistance and counsel, so long as they are respectful of people's right to decide for themselves what direction they will go in every aspect of their lives. And this respect is all about happiness as the fundamental goal they must be free to conceive and achieve.
~ ~ ~
That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy!
2 March 2005
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Previous issue:
ROLE MODEL
Here are some worthwhile passages (in response to my previous newsletter) excerpted from a letter by Daryl Rock, author of the inspirational book “Making a Difference: Profiles in Abilities”:
- “We always have something to be happy about, therefore thankful for.”
- “If you are feeling down, you have two options: change your situation to one that is conducive to happiness; and if this is not possible, change your attitude. In either case, action is required by you, the individual; stop blaming your circumstances.”
- “I have often had people… pity me [Daryl suffered a car accident that left him largely paralyzed]; and yet my quality of life is as high, if not higher, than anyone I know, able bodied or disabled!”
- “If happiness is an attitude (which it is), it is therefore an ‘inside job,’ meaning it is up to you.”
- “[You can] either feel good about yourself by putting others down (i.e., passing judgment that their quality of life is somehow less than yours) or feel good about yourself, based on an honest assessment of who you are, independently of others (what
have you contributed for the betterment of society or others, etc?). The latter option, although hard for many people, is by far the more noble as it does not require a belittling of others!”
- “Pride should not be a goal but rather a by-product of a healthy lifestyle. This lifestyle is dependent on decisions we make every day. Hitler was proud, is this a good thing? … Our purpose in life, which will ultimately determine our happiness, needs to be assessed using independent measures.”
- “I have held as truth for more than 25 years… that I am here, I am alive, to accomplish three things: to learn, to grow, and to teach. Whatever I choose to do in life has to be consistent with one or more of these. It is as a result of this that my life has been extremely rich…. I am 40 years old and have experienced a huge amount of tragedy and negative fortune in my life – some, such as my injury, with lifelong consequences. And yet I have the great fortune of having a truly happy life.”
- “By definition humans are social creatures. While there are individuals that do not conform to this rule, they are a minority. Society, to survive, is dependent on the inputs of its members…. Thus I made a choice. Do I want to contribute to a better society or do I, like some parasite, want to be a taker? I chose the former. But what does it mean to contribute? This depends on the individual – engineers, artists, writers, politicians, plumbers, garbage collectors, etc.”
~ ~ ~
L. G.: I applaud your attitude, Daryl. Your purpose and determination are exemplary and hence worthy of imitation.
Of course, pride is a delicate concept (as you pointed out very shrewdly) since it can blossom in a criminal mind as well as in a noble mind. It all depends on what goal one pursues, which indeed can either be criminal or noble. That is why, as you must have noticed, I mentioned pride last, after strength and kindness, to which it is subordinate. There is nothing wrong with feeling proud, as long as it is for the right reasons (i.e., noble ones), versus the wrong reasons (i.e., criminal ones). In sum, there is a moral pride and an immoral pride. The deciding factor is the goal that one pursues, which should be noble, consistent with the highest values of civilization, as opposed to the depraved standards of barbarianism. To be strong in the effort to be happy and kind yields a moral pride that does not deserve to be tempered with shame. This worthy effort is true to our human nature, to our inherent aspiration to happiness, and true to our social nature, as we live in solidarity with others, and ultimately true to the divine principle that upholds the very existence of everything.
~ ~ ~
THE ABILITY IN DISABILITY
To Daryl Rock, author of the book “Making a Difference: Profiles in Abilities.”
Congratulations; you have worked hard and your excellent book testifies to that. It was an easy and refreshing read, accessible to any literate mind and likely to inspire it in a very positive way. Whatever you do to get it in the hands of readers will be a logical and worthy extension of your commendable writing effort.
Here are short passages that have particularly held my attention:
1. “Take action, give something back.”
2. “... determined to fight for what they believed in – in the face of much adversity.”
3. “Kay ‘has the courage of her convictions…’”
4. “… face and overcome challenges.”
5. “…turning challenges into opportunities.”
6. “… make the best of life wherever he is.”
7. “… taking care of oneself… to build a foundation for giving.”
8. “I came through some difficult times personally, and I’m a better person for it.”
9. “You are special. You have many challenges, but you will be stronger because of them. Keep your head up, always be honest and do your best.”
10. “’get-out-there-and-do-it’ attitude…”
11. “… take charge of their own destiny.”
12. “… working to make a difference.”
13. “… using every ability we have to enable us to reach our full potential.”
14. “… greatest barrier in life – ignorance.”
15. “… a man committed to a cause greater than self.”
16. “… he doesn’t give up.”
17. “And every day he turns this caring into action.”
18. “People can be happy with so little.”
19. “… people have to work through things at their own speed.”
20. “… maximize a person’s quality of life… by maximizing his or her ability to live independently…”
21. “I have faith in life…. It is only by saying yes that we can realize what is possible in life. When you say no, you will never know…. Don’t wait to be perfect. Everyone needs someone to look up to…. Humanity needs role models…. Whatever happens, I will have the strength to go through it…. In each human you can see a piece of God…. You will be more successful in life if you do things you truly love to do.” [Says Lise Thibault]
22. “Helping individuals achieve their best.”
23. “… passion for life and commitment to helping others.”
24. “Attitude plays a role in how change impacts on an individual. Bruce views change as opportunity.”
25. “… positive attitude leading to a positive environment.”
26. “… the only thing we can control in life is how we deal with things.”
27. “Attitude determines quality of life.”
28. “… if I make up my mind that I want to do something, I just go for it. If I waited for opportunities to come my way, I don’t think I would have made it this far… Follow your dreams. Get your education and do the ground work. Have the lust for the work.” [Says Wendy Murphy]
29. “Focus on the positive.”
30. “Murphy’s law dictates that ‘Whatever can go wrong will go wrong.’ Wendy Murphy’s law is ‘Whatever can go wrong can be set right.”
31. “You’re wondering what it takes to succeed? Well, it’s not complicated. You have to have guts…. Don’t be afraid to fail sometimes. Failure, after all, is what gives value to success.” [Says Chantal Petitclerc]
32. “… life is not about who you are or what you have but, instead, what you are doing now and how to make peace with yourself before you die.”
33. “Everyone is labeled and there’s an expectation that comes with that label. If you accept those expectations, you limit yourself… You really have to find your own limits.” [says Ross Watson]
34. Allan Simpson: “If you can’t go straight ahead, go around.”
35. James Corbett: “When things are tough, you fight one more round.”
36. Helen Keller: “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.”
37. Voltaire: “It is not birth but virtue that makes the difference.”
38. Dr. Otis Maxfield: “Fate is what life gives you. Destiny is what you do with it.”
39. Winston Churchill: “The optimist sees opportunity in every danger; the pessimist sees danger in every opportunity.”
40. Martin Luther King: “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”
41. Thomas Jefferson: “Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.”
42. Charles Dickens: “Reflect on your present blessings, of which every man has many; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”
43. Ayn Rand: “Happiness is that state of consciousness, which proceeds from the achievement of one’s values.”
~ ~ ~
That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be worthy (proudly good. Reservations, anyone?)!
23 February 2005
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Previous issue:
CHIN UP!
In response to an observation by Aron Lee on his blog (http://keaston.modblog.com/): “I've long believed that joy and contentment were choices, not conditions we can't help but assume. But if that was true, wouldn't we all choose to be happy?”
Here I throw a few buoyant quotes your way, as a friendly gesture to help you rise above the gloomy clouds now shrouding your mind. But first, a short comment: Happiness is indeed largely a matter of positive attitude, though circumstances remain a factor inasmuch as they must be at least minimally favorable for happiness to be possible. Infinite and insuperable suffering is by definition irremediably joyless. Having said this, isn't it safe to assume that circumstances are commonly better than the pitiful extreme just described? Consequently, happiness is possible for a great number of people, you included, and it is contingent on their attitude, which must be positive. Now, a positive attitude isn't widespread as it ought to be for one simple reason: it is difficult to master and sustain, and this difficulty can only be overcome through strength of character.
1. “… a wild bird put in a cage… grows more and more tame with time, until it finally adapts to captivity and resumes singing. Does this song hold the essence of earthly contentment, which involves confinement? I am alluding to the confines of reality…”
2. “…life is an opportunity to make the best of things when we cannot better them. It is rarely so bad that this best amounts to nothing good. It is usually worth living, though its value is often concealed by pain and strain, during a search for meaning that resembles a treasure hunt.”
3. “Although life comes with many strings attached – many determining factors, internal or external – humans are not mere puppets in the hands of circumstances. They may suffer, but they have the power to react against their suffering, unless they are mentally and physically incapacitated in the extreme. The more they passively claim to be the victim of a bad situation, the more they are an undeclared accomplice to it, for lack of struggling to better it or make the best of it.”
4. “The right way is a hard way. But then, a battle without struggle is a victory without glory. Pride is our prize.”
5. “… being defeated is never tantamount to losing the battle, except when it means death or such a severe disability that life is hopelessly reduced to coma or agony. Generally, if we suffer a defeat on one front, we can enjoy a victory on another.”
6. “If you lead a happy life, of which you may be to some degree unmindful, never let a day pass without reflecting on the life of misery you could be leading instead. Imagine having lost everything and everyone you love. You will be happier for the realization that you are spared this misery.”
7. “Things that happen to us are merely the occasion for our feelings and responses, whose primary cause is our outlook. This mental interface between us and the world is the realm of liberty where we can indulge in foolishness and suffer the consequences, or strive for wisdom and enjoy its benefits.”
The above quotes are excerpted from my book A REASON FOR LIVING.
I wish you every happiness!
Laurent Grenier
~ ~ ~
A LOVE AFFAIR WITH LIFE
This is a short and sweet article by Steve Goodier. He is a professional speaker, consultant and author of numerous books. Visit his site for more information, or to sign up for his FREE newsletter of Life, Love and Laughter at http://LifeSupportSystem.com.
Italian actor Roberto Benigni has been described as a charming and
effusive man who, in his joy over winning the 1998 Academy Award for
best actor for his performance in the film “Life Is Beautiful,” danced
over the tops of chairs and leaped up on stage. With that in mind,
listen to what he says on the subject of gratitude: "It's a sign of
mediocrity when you demonstrate gratitude with moderation."
Gratitude with moderation! Doesn't that describe how many of us
approach life?
We rarely show gratitude for each miraculous new day. We wait too long to tell others what they mean to us. We're more excited about acquiring something new than taking inventory of all we already have.
The word that too often describes our gratitude is "moderate." You
know the adage: “In all things, moderation,” but I've never heard, "In
gratitude, moderation." There should NEVER be moderation in showing
gratitude!
Author Sarah Ban Breathnach says, "Every time we remember to say
'thank you,' we experience nothing less than heaven on earth."
Imagine living every day demonstrating gratitude with abandon. Imagine
becoming excessive in thanksgiving. Every day would be another episode
in your never-ending love affair with life.
~ ~ ~
INSPIRATIONAL TIDBITS
1. "Whether you're a candle in a corner,
or a beacon on a hill,
let your light shine brightly."
- anonymous
2. “It is not the critic who counts,
nor the man who points out how the strong man stumbled,
or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,
whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;
who strives valiantly;
who errs and comes short again and again;
who knows great enthusiasms, great devotions;
who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement,
and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly,
so that his place shall never be with those timid souls
who know neither victory nor defeat.”
- Theodore Roosevelt
3. "In order to be walked on, you have to be lying down."
- Brian Weir
4. "At the timberline where the storms strike with the most fury, the sturdiest trees are found."
- Hudson newsletter
5. "The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm."
- unknown
6. "He who asks a question may be a fool for five minutes, but he who never asks a question remains a fool forever."
- Tom J. Connelly
7. "When one door closes, another opens. But we often look so regretfully upon the closed door that we don't see the one that has opened for us."
- Alexander Graham Bell
~ ~ ~
That's it for now, until next time. Meanwhile, be strong, be kind, be proud!
16 February 2005
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